Wedding Clothes

Matthew 22: 1-14

Tom Long tells a story of a time when he and Barbara Brown Taylor and Fred Craddock went to an Atlanta Braves baseball game.  About three rows in front of where they were sitting was a rowdy group of guys in muscle shirts who were drinking lots of beers, and about the 7^th inning they had had too many and were getting way out of hand.  Suddenly down the steps came a SWAT team of security forces (black shirts, security earphones), they came down the steps and pointed to the rowdiest one in the bunch.  He didn’t budge, so they went over and grabbed him and pull him out of his seat and muscled him out of the stadium.  They sat silently for a minute, and then Craddock said, “Must not have had on a wedding garment.”

When Deb and I got engaged some 16 years ago, there was some concern about how our families would deal with our very different cultural backgrounds.  Could a marriage between two people from vastly divergent worlds really work?  No, I’m not talking about the cultural differences between Korean and American families.  I’m talking about the vast gulf of differences between the East Coast and the West Coast.

As someone who grew up in the West, it was an enormous adjustment for me to go to school back East.  It’s not just that I’m a weather wimp; people seem to live by different rules there.  For one thing, they’re usually much more formal.  Most people really dress up to go to church: coat and ties for men, a dress and heels for women.  Don’t even think about wearing shorts and a t-shirt, even on the most sticky, humid days in an un-air conditioned sanctuary.

Most churches on the West Coast, on the other hand, are what you would call “casual dress” congregations, including Wallingford.  Oh, sure, some people still like to get dressed up for service, and that’s great, but on the whole, we dress casually here, and that’s o.k., too.  Most of us don’t really care how people dress, as long as they feel comfortable being here.

The fact that we’re a “casual dress” congregation may be why many of us react so strongly to this morning’s story about the underdressed guest.  What did the king expect?  If you’re going to go out into the streets and recruit wedding guests at the last minute, how can you expect them to be wearing the right clothes?  After all, “No one walks around in wedding robes, just in case they happen to be invited to a royal banquet.” (Barbara Brown Taylor, Home By Another Way, 192-3).

It’s helpful to remember that everything in this story has a deeper meaning.  The opening line says, “the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who gave a wedding banquet for his son.”  Gee, any guesses who that Son could be?  The Son of God, perhaps?  Likewise, the original invited guests, the people off the streets, and the wedding garment all symbolize other things.

It’s helpful to know the story behind this story, which was Jesus’ disappointment, and Matthew’s after him, that so few of God’s chosen people were responding to the invitation to join God’s grand celebration.  The Apostle Paul was also deeply disappointed that many of his own people ignored God’s invitation.  However, largely through his efforts, the early Christian community was opened to the Gentiles – non-Jews, the people off the streets – and new controversy arose.

Many of the latecomers, who didn’t know the history of God’s relationship with Israel, acted as if God’s grace gave them permission to live any way they wanted to.  Meanwhile, the Jewish Christians were still trying to figure out what it meant for them to be free from the Law. 
 Pretty soon, the early church had a discipline problem on its hands, as believers showed up at God’s table with no idea of what it meant for them to be there.  Barbara Brown Taylor notes, “As far as they were concerned, you showed up in God’s presence however you wanted to show up, because Jesus had squared everything with God forever: The invitation to the heavenly banquet was ‘come as you are.’ All were welcome and nothing was required: no fancy clothes, no etiquette, no RSVP.” (Taylor, 194)

“Wrong,” says Matthew.  And Taylor adds, “Being an invited guest doesn’t mean you may do as you please.  Being invited at the last minute doesn’t mean anything goes.  People of God!  You have been invited to feast with the king!  Rise to the occasion!” (194)

Like everything else in the story, the wedding robe has a deeper meaning.  Tom Long notes that the “wedding garment” symbolizes the Christian life.  It’s a way of life that honors the king; it’s a way of life that shows respect to the host of the wedding, even if the invitation comes at the last minute.  Let’s be clear - Taylor says, “The underdressed guest’s mistake was not that he showed up in shorts.  It was that he showed up short on righteousness and thought no one would notice, least of all the king” (Taylor, 194). 

This story addressed a particular situation in the early church, but does it have a word for us living in the 21^st century?

Well, everyone in Seattle was invited to be here this morning, or somewhere like here, but as you can see, some of them had other things to do.  Some are playing golf, some are working, some are still in bed sipping their lattes.  And we’re here…so far, so good, but before we get too cocky, let’s remember that when the king’s slaves went out into the streets, they “gathered all whom they found, both good and bad.” 

According to Fred Craddock, this story is about the final judgment. “And what is the basis of judgment?  It’s not simply whether one says yes or no to the invitation.  The invitation is most gracious; all are invited, both bad and good.  But just because all are invited doesn’t mean there are no standards, no expectations of the guests.  A wedding garment (kingdom talk for new life, righteous conduct) is expected.” (Preaching Through the Christian Year A, 475)  Being forgiven doesn’t mean not trying to live a righteous life.

That’s exactly what Dietrich Bonheoffer meant by cheap grace: “Cheap grace is the preaching of forgiveness without requiring repentance, baptism without church discipline, Communion without confession.  Cheap grace is grace without discipleship, grace without the cross, grace without Jesus Christ, living and incarnate.” (Cost of Discipleship, 47)

This parable urgently reminds us that being a part of the Christian community should make a discernible difference in who we are and how we live. 

Like the underdressed guest, do we sometimes roll into church without thinking much about it?  Again, I’m NOT talking about what clothes we’ve got on.  Do we at times show up with our “spiritual shirttails hanging out?” (Taylor, 195).  If so, that’s more than ignorance; that’s disrespectful and irresponsible.  “It’s rudeness to the groom; offensive to the bride; impolite to the father and mother and loutish behavior in front of the other invited guests, the good and the bad, who bothered to dress and behave appropriately with respect.  At the wedding of a prince given by a king, every one of every class knows better than that.” (Homiletics, 10/02, p. 59)

Maybe the sad truth is that some of us didn’t think it mattered.  We’re living in a post-Christian age in this country, and most churches are happy for anyone they can get.  Like the king’s slaves, they’re out in the streets looking for anyone to come to the wedding.  Is it any wonder that there are people who think that showing up was all that mattered?

That’s what the underdressed guest thought.  “He thought the king was just looking for warm bodies,” (Taylor, 195).  He was happy to eat the king’s food and enjoy the king’s festivities.  That’s exactly what he was doing, when the king walked right up to him.

“Friend,” he says to the man (and in Matthew, the word “friend” always has a negative connotation, something like “Buster” – think about the way a policeman says it before he asks how fast you were going), “Friend, how did you get in here without a wedding robe?”

The guest is silent.  If only he had replied.  “If only he had apologized, asked forgiveness, mentioned his poverty or humbly pleaded,” (Homiletics, 58) then maybe he might have been allowed to stay.  Instead, he was speechless.  He had nothing to say.  So he was bounced from the party.

God is not looking just for warm bodies.  “God’s invitation, as extravagant and as open as it is, carries responsibility.” (Homiletics, 59). Tom Long notes, “Many are called, but few are chosen” basically means “God wants everybody at the party, but not everybody wants to come or knows how to behave when they get there.”  Depending on where you are on your journey of faith, just showing up today may be a huge step for you.  I don’t want to underestimate that.  Showing up is absolutely the right starting point – and it’s a starting point.

Today’s passage extends a glorious and gracious invitation – we’re invited not only into this sanctuary, into this service today, but into abundant life.  We’re invited to all the joys and responsibilities of Christian discipleship and Christian community.  Taylor says, “This may not be the heavenly wedding banquet, but it is certainly the rehearsal dinner, where each of us gets a chance to practice our parts.” (Taylor, 195)

God is not just looking just for warm bodies.  “God is looking,” says Taylor, “for wedding guests, who will rise to the occasion of honoring the son.  We can do that in shorts and running shoes, I think, as well as we can do it in suits and high heels, because our wedding robes are not made out of denim or silk.  They are made from the whole fabric of our lives, using patterns God has given us – patterns of justice, forgiveness, loving-kindness, peace.  When we stitch them up and put them on we are gorgeous, absolutely gorgeous.  I don’t know why we would want to wear anything else, especially if we want to be ready for a wedding whenever the invitation comes.” (Taylor, 196)  Amen.